Over the past few months I've had a bit of an obsession. And no I'm not talking about with sandwiches, or my cat--those aren't obsessions those are necessary parts of my life. My obsession that I refer to is---Disco.
"But Andre, disco is dead". Well guess what? I brought it back because it's the shit. Yes that's right, in the great month of April I am throwing a massive disco party at my apartment which may or may not contain the presence of an amazing disco ball, glow sticks, glitter, and a gold fringe curtain. I know what you're thinking and the answer is yes--there will be fake cocaine adorning the tables that I have covered in tin foil to mimic a mirror. Studio 54 is now in Brookline Massachusetts.
So in this obsession, I have been downloading an unhealthy amount of disco. It seems I can't function properly if I don't rock out in a quick dance party before doing something. Which is why the easy solution to all of life's problems is taking disco and mixing it up with horror--that way, everyone is happy. So without further ado, here are some disco hits that can be perfectly dedicated to some of our very favorite horror characters.
Last Night a DJ Saved My Life
Dedicated to Evelyn Draper--Play Misty for Me
This is an amazing song that many of you have not had the time to experience. Luckily that can all change for you when you click on this video. This song is also the perfect theme song for resident crazy lady Evelyn Draper who finds herself very much obsessed with hottie DJ Clint Eastwood in Play Misty for Me. A DJ did save her life and reminded her that she had something worth living for--that is unless of course he decides to break things off with her in which case........
Yeah, let's just try not to go there huh Clint?
On a side note I also would like to dedicate this song to Leatherface who found solace in the sweet melody that is one Vanita "Stretch" Brock.
Dedicated to Becca--The Crazies
This remake of The Crazies invaded our senses with one of the coolest scenes in recent memory. I speak of course of the Car Wash scene where poor Becca unexpectedly found herself caught by a hose, or something sneaky and BAM was dead. Sorry for ruining anything. Clearly any normal person could not possibly watch that scene without singing the absolutely groovy Car Wash by the aptly named Rose Royce. Honestly, how much cooler would that scene have been if they played this in background? I shudder to find out.
I Love the Night Life
Dedicated to Jerry Dandridge--Fright Night
This song could obviously be dedicated to any number of vampires in the vampire sub genre but the honor goes rightfully to Jerry Dandridge, who is quite the fan of nightclubs himself. Clearly he loves the night life (because he's a vampire) and clearly he got to boogie on the disco 'round oh yeeeeeea.
I Will Survive
Dedicated to Sydney Prescott--Scream
This song has always spoke volumes to me when put in the context of Scream and Sydney's dire situation. Yes she was at first petrified, but somehow by that final frame she is kicking ass and taking names. Hiding in closets, stealing voice changers, sticking fingers in people's wounds----shit's crazy!
I'll Always Love My Mama
Dedicated to Jason Voorhees--Friday the 13th
There seem to be a lot of mama's boys kicking it lately but my favorite has always been Jason. Sure Norman Bates may seem like the right choice but I like to think he secretly hates his mother and also he kind of is his mother---so than he would just love himself and things would get messy. Therefore--Jason wins. I mean let's get serious, the man has a serious mommy crush and he would do anything for her...as a matter of a fact he does do everything for her as evidence by that time that girl put on his mother's sweater and pretended to be her. The kid is a softie.
Dedicated to Cropsy--The Burning
People are always catching on fire in horror movies. In fact, it's a little ridiculous when you think about it. I could have chosen any number of people to dedicate this song to...Carrie, Freddy Krueger, that girl in that sleeping bag in the Friday the 13th remake....Joan of Arc, the list goes on. Needless to say, I have chosen Cropsy because is there really anyone who had a cooler disco inferno moment? Just pretend he's dancing when he's on fire and everything in life will suddenly make sense.