Monday, August 1, 2011

The Scary Face Club: August Inductees

If you are searching for a way to make your summer last longer, then you should start a totally awesome club that only meets once a month. I swear, the time in between Scary Face Club meetings gets longer and longer and no matter how much I wish that a new month will begin---it seems I still must wait. Who knew that it was physically impossible to will time to move faster?

Well don't worry kids, because August is here and a new meeting of The Scary Face Club is now in session. By the way, were YOU aware that Ann M. Martin wrote a book recently called The Summer Before about the summer before the Babysitters Club began? Me neither, why don't people keep me informed about important things like that?

The Phantom

(The Phantom of the Opera)

When I saw the Phantom of the Opera for the first time, I couldn't believe how effective and scary the unveiling of the Phantom really was. It catches you off guard and it definitely scares the shit out of you whether you like to admit it or not. Perhaps what has always been the most fascinating thing about The Phantom of the Opera however, is that Lon Chaney pretty much got his own face to look like that. Sticking wires up places they don't belong, using tape, cotton balls you name it--Lon Chaney somehow (Although I wouldn't put it past the man to use an actual knife) got his face to look like that. Call me crazy, but even today in the advanced world of FX makeup--few things come as close to frightening as this face does. Am I right?

The Woman

(The Woman)

I've been holding off on inducting The Woman into The Scary Face Club because I wanted to wait until I could get a decent picture of her at her most frightening. The above picture really does not do Pollyanna McIntosh justice and it saddens me that so many people have not been able to see this craziness for themselves yet. In case you missed it, The Woman is one crazy fucking ride and The Woman herself has this way about her. She stares at your with her wild eyes and I swear to God, it makes you think she is going to lurch out of the screen at any minute and bite your face off. I even had to look away at one point and pretend to find something in my purse, to avoid looking at her face. It's that scary! Trust me.



Pennywise would be scary enough even if he didn't have those razor sharp teeth. Clowns are scary period, but hopefully you already know that. And if you don't.....where have you been? Anyways, whenever you mix clowns with blatant horror, fear seems to head deep into the extreme. Such is the case in Stephen King's IT, where Pennywise becomes this horrible landmark of holy shit moments. For most of us, our fear of clowns probably began with the viewing of IT and for the rest of us--what the fuck? How can Pennywise not be one of the scariest faces in the world? How?

Reverend Henry Kane

(Poltergeist II)

While Poltergeist II is a terrible movie, it does have one tremendously awesome thing going for it--the Reverend Henry Kane. And by tremendously awesome I do mean, horribly horrible. Because I would never wish the image of Reverend Henry Kane knocking on the screen door upon my worst enemy. The man is a walking corpse, which I realize is in bad taste because he died shortly after the film was wrapped, but so be it. It's only been a few weeks since I watched Poltergeist II but I still cannot get the image of him wiped clear from my brain, or the sound of his sickeningly sweet little voice blocked from my ears.

Eli's man face

(Let the Right One In)

If you've never seen Let the Right One In, you're probably surprised that the above face made it into this esteemed club. If you have seen it however, then you know exactly why it made it in. There is something so unbelievably scary about Eli's creepy older man face. In that one moment, her childish exterior turns into a foul and scary looking beast and it does so, without being literally scary. That is to say it does not go the route that the American remake goes, by turning her into a snarling CGI happy vampire. Instead we get this moment that literally sends chills down your spine. It's a moment that reminds us how inhuman Eli truly is, despite what her heart and character tells us.


Anonymous said...

Andre, could you please reveiw "The Awakening" (1980) starring Charlton Heston, its one of the most charming and magical horror films i`ve ever seen, i`ve seen it about 50 times and i literally cant stop watching it. By the way, i`m still waiting for that reveiw of "Frankenstein Created Woman" (1967) for more or less the same reasons.

Bleeding Dead said...

I'm with you on Eli, there's something really unsettling about her facial features, that's hard to make out. I'm not sure if it's because she's just a little girl and she's vicious or she just has a creepy expression.

But I'm going with The Phantom, the make up on Lon Chaney still holds up after all this time.

Spooky Sean said...

Dude, that part in The Woman where she darts at the camera when she is tied in the fruit cellar...
I nearly pissed myself after seeing that part at the Boston Underground Film Festival Screening.
And right on with Pennywise; Tim Curry was clearly the best part of the IT mini series.

Anonymous said...

I HAVE to add this suggestion to the Scary Face Club - the scene in "The Ring" of the girl curled up in the closet after she watched the video...shown through a flashback from her mother. The scene was so fast it totally rattles you - I stupidly paused the movie to check out her face and really, really wished I hadn't/

Kookoobird said...

I am not even kidding; it took me almost twenty years to get over rev Kane from Poltergeist. I am a giant woos and that movie scared the crap outta me! I was afraid that I would see him, but no one else would like in the movie when people walk right through him... eeeeeeeek!

Dr. Theda said...

We have in my area an elderly Lawyer Who looks just about the Rev. Kane
a while back I had heard that he had passed on ...imagine my shock to wale into a store in my town and see this over six foot tall supposed "Corpse" Smiling down at me ... to say that I was "shaken' Is an Understatement... it seems that he had just had a stroke ... But very scary in his black suit and black hat... he looks a lot like Kane...
the Doctor