Showing posts with label After Dark Horrorfest. Show all posts
Showing posts with label After Dark Horrorfest. Show all posts

Monday, January 11, 2010

From Within: Rumer Willis' Face Always Ruins Everything.


I had high hopes for this- I did. And you know why? Because I find that I'm strangely drawn to suicides. Why is that? By all accounts I should be tied to the stake and burned for having interest in such a thing- but for some reason when I see suicides on film I find them to be strangely breath taking and an interesting idea in general. I will never understand the act of suicide- but I do find them thought provoking- and if done right- horribly beautiful. Don't throw stones at me just yet.

From Within is about a small town overrun by the most terrifying people in the world- the uber religious. The types of Christians whose masses seem more like a concert-where people jump out of their seats and praise Jesus and then probably speak in babbling languages known as "tongues". One things for sure- when your pastor has to wear a head set microphone--get the fuck out of that town. But I digress...this town has recently developed a strange sort of plague. One that causes everyone to commit suicide. Is it caused by the absence of religion and the devil taking over- as the creepy religious ones think? Or is there something larger at work here? If you are looking for an answer I'm sorry because when all is said and done, this movie makes no sense.

Come to find out those "devil worshippers" aka the only family in town who does not believe in religion-- ARE actually practicing "magic". My problem with the movie lies in this very simple fact. The magic that is practiced is something very dark- and probably non-existent. Therefore it's pretty much just painting the so called hero in a bad light- and in turn, making the uber Christians look like they were right the whole time. What is up with that? Why can't the whole idea of committing suicide and the further idea of waging war on yourself just be a product of the evilness of hardcore organized religion? Actually- better question, why does it have to be anyone's fault at all? Putting an actual explanation to the curse is in my opinion this films biggest down fall. Putting the atheist kid in charge of the curse--2nd biggest downfall.

The suicides would have been interesting had there not have been that whole "evil twin" thing happening. I enjoyed the mysteriousness and overall creepy tone that happened before we were introduced to this unearthly side of ourselves. Granted it is interesting to know that the person carrying out and orchestrating the suicide is a scary version of ourselves. Our dark sides against our good? The ultimate fight that perhaps should occur when a suicide is considered. But is it really? Once again this just brings up the whole religious aspect- and I really just felt that the entire movie was hypocritical. We are suppose to be on Aidan's side- who when he is attacked for not believing in God- and accused of worshipping the devil states "How can you worship something that doesn't exist? The devil is a creation of your religion" YET goes ahead and summons an evil curse that will kill each and every citizen by putting "the devil" into their minds and forcing them to submit to what is evil....???! Gah. My head hurts.

Anyways- other things that ruined this movie for me were; Rumer Willis' face.


Gah. What a beastie. How she is the spawn of Demi Moore we will never know...


The fact that Amanda and Michelle from America's Next Top Model were both in this. And that Amanda got the better acting role- when we all know Michelle is better at everything....


The murder of Sadie- which came completely out of left field. The fact that the movie was way way way too over the top emo- romantic- and the passionate kiss and sobbing in the last scene was unjustified and did not make sense. And of course the just all too ridiculous nature of the uber Christians.

Things that were kind of awesome; the alcoholic Mom's suicide, the last few stills of suicide's at the end during the credits, and finally, the opening scene- which gave me a false sense of excitement so actually maybe that's a negative. Drats!

Anyways I felt this could have been way better. It started to drag and before long just became a snoozer. After finding out that the suicide curse really was just a suicide curse- I completely lost interest--and I blame it on Rumer Willis. Oh and the lead girl reminded me of Ali Lohan....gross.

Autopsy: Dude. It Makes Tons Of Sense.

With the fourth After Dark Horrorfest steadily approaching, I've decided to take a look back at some films featured in previous years. While films in the past have gone from amazing- (Frontier(s) ) to questionable (Snoop Dogg's Hood of Horror) - it's pretty safe to assume that you get lucky every now and then and other times......yeah. I would have to place Autopsy on the "yeah." scale just for the sheer ridiculousness.

Autopsy may very well have been a film for the horror masses- filled with gallons of blood- "funny" one liners- and even some homages to Italian horror. The plot seemed interesting enough- after a car accident a group of Mardi Gras partying peeps, get sent to a hospital where they learn that the doctor is a little different....instead of trying to save patients he seems to have pulled a Mr. Freeze- and resorted to harvesting other people in order to keep his wife alive and cure whatever zombie ailments she has. Creepy hospitals? Count me in.

The film is a bit flawed however, as it becomes very apparent rather quickly that things just don't make sense. And don't give me that "this is a horror movie it doesn't have to make sense bull shit". I'm sorry. But if you've just run over a man with your car and the ambulance comes and tosses the guy into the back rather violently- and leaves him back there without assisting him with any medical attention--I would think your ears would be perked up just a little. Not to mention once you arrive at the hospital there is one nurse and one doctor- and that is ok? I guess...... And don't even get me started on the whole- I used to be in medical school but dropped out but it's totally normal that the doctor would need to give me a spinal tap when all I did was hit my head????????????????????????? Emphasis on the question marks there.

It's just a little absurd without being based solely around the absurdity. Ya know? For instance--In the Mouth of Madness is absurd. But we are given what we need to take that absurdity and realize that it's all part of a larger and intricate idea, so it's justified. And heck- it's called In the Mouth of Madness so yeah. Autopsy is just ridiculous without any explanation. And that is a problem for me.

The gore is OK- although quite distractingly fake looking at times. But I did enjoy seeing that naked guy fall on that girl and have all of his organs fall onto her. The piece of glass that the guy pulls out of his side in the beginning was pretty disgusting and I almost passed out a little. And then the ending scene with the organs and circulatory system suspended in air- pretty damn sweet. But again- it's creative gore- and there isn't really anything to back it up. It's not creative enough to make up for everything else.

Basically the movie is predictable with it's scares- and everything is highly unlikely to happen---last I checked getting a drill through your skull actually IS a big deal and you can't just break loose and run around like a nut job. Also- what is up with that police man? Nice moves. Oh and perhaps the biggest blunder and absurd situation that ever happened in any movie EVER.....

Why on earth would gladly accept the T-1000 as your doctor????


Right. Big no no. Also can someone explain why some patients were just walking around- and what's his face was the only one to have his organs strung up like that? HOW DO HANGING ORGANS DO ANYTHING HELPFUL? What an aggravating hour and a half!

Anyways this sadly does not get my stamp of approval. It ends up just being a gorier and less good version of Hostel. Plus there are no boobs--dude? WTF

Buy Autopsy at Horror Movie Empire