Friday, March 19, 2010

The Fashion Digest: Outerwear and Accessories

Well I don't know about you guys, but here in Boston the weather has been simply gorgeous! I even saw some purple and yellow flowers creeping up out of the dirt today. The sudden spring peep show that we are getting makes me extremely excited for spring and buying a whole new spring wardrobe (thank you tax return money!). So I thought it appropriate to have this edition of the Fashion Digest focus on a few spring goodies that mostly have to do with outerwear and some fabulous and classic accessories.

I went through a scarf phase not too long ago- actually until very recently aka when it was still frigid out I wore some delightful scarves! I also put that same delightful scarf in the washing machine and it turned all my clothes turquoise...whoops! But I think a lot of people forget that scarves are just as important in the spring and summer as they are in the colder months. A beautiful scarf can jazz up the drabbest of outfits. I've chosen a few examples here to give you an idea of what I mean... Mrs. Thorn from The Omen for one
who decided to wear hers as a turban. Which again is a style I'm not totally OK with but Emmy Doomas says it's OK so I guess it's OK. And Mary from Carnival of Souls who went with a more classic and Hollywood Glam look! Take it away Emmy!

Scarves, A Lesson in Versatility
And on the sixth day, God created scarves. I don’t think scarves have really gotten their dues. They are by far the most versatile accessories to grace this planet. They are like that good friend who you can take to a party where they will know no-one and still have a great time and they won’t even vomit on you! Scarves can be worn throughout the year, inside or outside, around your neck, head, or even lovingly tied around the strap of what would have been a forgotten and boring brown leather handbag! Scarves make anyone instantly chic, which is why I have convinced myself over the years to buy about 2.5 billion. Female horror movie characters are no strangers to the brilliance of the scarf. Take Damien’s mom, huddling demurely under a gauzy headscarf! Her son may be a demon, but that doesn’t mean her hair should go all frizzy! For some reason, I’ve really been into headscarves for this upcoming summer. It reminds me of the French Rivera, sunbathing on my non-existent yacht, and sipping kir royales in large Chanel sunglasses.

Unfortunately there are about 2.5 million ways not to wear a headscarf. Wear it one way, and you’re channeling Brett Michaels.
Wear it another way and people will think you hail from Saudi Arabia or the cancer ward at Dana Farber (Disclosure: I think headscarves on cancer patients are beautiful!) Despite what I think of her early career as Paris Hilton’s bitch, I think this trio of photos of Nicole Ritchie, wearing her scarf in three different ways, is almost iconic. See how she’s wearing the headscarf folded wide, yet back on her forehead? Make sure some hair can be seen, and voile - instant French glam! No one would ever suspect she used to be some horrible crack whore with bad style! You go Nicole!


I've recently got into belts again since my constant fluctuation in weight makes for ill fitting pants every now and again. Since I don't have the cash to buy new pants every time I lose or gain weight, the easy fix is a belt! It was pretty tricky to find any good representations of belts in horror. Although this may be due to the fact that I was just really too lazy to comb through hundreds of horror movies. So I settled on the lovely Regina Belmont from Night of the Comet. Classic 80s movie, classic 80s pants, classic 80s belt pretty much. Nowadays girls wear belts without pant loops- what must the old people think?! So please tell us Emmy Doomas how to make a sassy belt an integrated part of our spring wardrobe.

Belts, Pants Holder Uppers My Ass
I find belts on women hilarious. Biologically, they do not make sense. Men wear belts because they have no hips. No belt = pants around your knees. But women have basically their own built in belts---they are called hips ladies, and you should be damn proud of them! Why is this woman with an automatic wearing a belt? Never mind why did she tuck her shirt in? Does she look so peeved, because her mom jean styling has left her with camel toe!? I like her shirt though---and wait wasn’t she in Weekend at Bernies!!!?? So even though pants come with mandatory belt loops, I would leave them empty, and subscribe to the notion of outer belt wearing. I feel like this trend has just exploded in the last few years. You’re never fully dressed without a belt! I don’t know how many times I’ve drooled over the belted cardigan look from JCrew—but it’s divine.

What I’m really into recently, are more decorative belts. Belts are becoming adorned with everything under the sun---flowers, bows, jewels—which just ups the feminine factor and ensures that you won’t be putting these belts anywhere near the waist band of your jeans. These belts are meant to be shown off!

After last week's debacle with the heavy rain for 4 days, I decided that I should probably get a rain coat. I also decided that maybe I shouldn't buy cheap umbrellas from Walgreens because they break almost immediately. A raincoat is a pretty timeless piece of fashion and I must say I do break out in a bit of a smile whenever I see someone wearing one. They are actually kind of rare if you think about it. That is why I love Alice's (or the killer's) raincoat in Alice Sweet Alice! Although I guess I wouldn't pick the classic bright yellow, I might go for something more exciting like blue, or vibrant red ala The Donald's daughter in Don't Look Now. (sort of mimicked here by the scary Dwarf lady..although that looks more like a pea coat with toggle buttons. Hmm)

Don’t Rain on My Parade

Kittttties! Ok, now that the gratuitous cat picture made its way into my post (I’m as much of a cat lover as my dear sweet blog host)….bring on the raincoats! I went through this phase where all I wanted was a bright yellow raincoat and red wellies. Now, a yellow raincoat mostly makes me think of the Gorton man, and that ain’t good!
Barf—fish sticks should be obliterated from this Earth!
Yes, it’s very handy to look like a giant daffodil once those spring showers hit (I doubt you would be a victim of a hit and run) but I think the iconic yellow raincoat is just too juvenile. Plus, in choosing a raincoat, I think this masked murderer had it totally wrong. Yay on the hood. Nay on the patent leather. One year I got a great kelly green raincoat at Marshalls for 20 bucks. I realized why it was 20 bucks, when after a year the zipper had broken, the hood had fallen off, and I had several mystery stains. However it was fabulous and I wore it until my cat peed all over it last year!

Here’s a kick-ass one from Michael Kors. Candy apple red with a detachable hood—need I say more!

If anyone feels the needs to buy me this, to replace the one that my cat so lovingly whizzed on, I will love you forever!


I'm not really a hat person. I tend to think of hats the same way that I would a pair of sunglasses. Where at first I find them to look completely great and then the next day I shake my head in dismay and wonder what I could have been thinking. The fact is some people can wear hats and some people can't--but then if you take a look back at some classic film stars like Jimmy Stewart in the Man Who Knew Too Much or Jane Randolph's character in Cat People and think, maybe hats were just made better back then? It seems like everybody wore a hat back in the day and everyone looked pretty damn good. Where were all the people with weird shaped heads? I often think back to those times and secretly hope that hats will make a brilliant comeback. Hat boxes? Yes please.

Fedora, Gimme Some More-a

My mom says I can wear any hat (I think it’s because I have what my sisters like to refer to as a “Charlie Brown head”) though I’ve never been brave enough to try out a fedora. Who am I trying to be? A gangster at a speak-easy? Al Capone? The singer of that god awful song Mambo #5?

But I think anyone can pull off a fedora. And if that means I get to pretend I’m Jimmy Stewart for a day—I’m in! It’s all in the material. I’m digging these straw ones for spring/summer. Pay no attention to the cracked out picture of an orange Lindsey Lohan! Yeesh!
And since we’re talking hats, I just want to give a shout out to one of my favorite hat styles of all time---the cloche. I have a semi obsession with the 1920s—aside from that pesky Prohibition, I would teleport back there in a heartbeat. Here’s a cute as a button one from Anthro:

I bet even Jimmy Stewart would like this hat!

1 comment:

Unknown said...

Wish I didn't have a baby belly so I could wear that pretty flower hipster belt. Love all your suggestions. I can just see you in the hat in the final picture. Great fashion tips as usual. Keep writing.