Wednesday, October 20, 2010

Bored? Waste Time on the Internet.

If you're like me then you are a self proclaimed cat, sandwich and bad TV lover. By default you're also lazy, awesome and fond of Donald Pleasance. According to my calculations, this means that exactly 80% of you are bored at some point during the day. Maybe you are sitting at work and pretending to do work but really surfing the Internet for anything to hold your attention. Or perhaps you are at home and passing the time by taking naps. Whatever your boredom diagnosis-- today, it's all going to change.

Since I am a professional connoisseur of the lazy gene I've pooled together my resources to bring you the best ways to waste time. All involving movies, or horror movies in some way. Grab your cat, your Snuggie and a sandwich and kiss your boredom goodbye.

I love Sporcle with almost every bone of my body. Once discovering it my senior year of college, I developed a nasty habit of trying to memorize every flag of the world and would grow angry every time I forgot that the Democratic Republic of the Congo, and the Republic of the Congo were two separate entities in the land once known as simply Congo. What does this have to do with horror movies? Well! Sporcle is a website of quizzes. Sure, taking a quiz may not seem like fun-- but it is. There is no other website that allows you to gloat over the fact that you can name all 50 states in under 10 minutes. Not only this, but Sporcle has quizzes ranging in subjects from Movies and TV, to Geography and Literature, to the always popular miscellaneous category.

I guarantee once you find out about Sporcle, you will be lost in a land of magic. Try out these quizzes geared toward us horror fans, and brag to those around you that you know every single Alfred Hitchcock movie ever made.

Other Favorites

Movie Quotes (There are several sequels to this quiz)

Video Game Themes w/ sound clips

and MORE TONS MORE. I'm telling you Sporcle is addictive and there are so many quizzes to play. Get started and thank me later.

I was first introduced to FilmWise by the lovely Nicki of Hey! Look Behind You! Nicki posts the invisibles quiz every week on her blog, and every week I beat myself up over not being able to figure out what damn movie that damn shirt is from. Basically the deal is this. There are 8 screen grabs where the characters have been rendered invisible and only their clothes remain. Can you figure out what movie it's from? It's harder than you think, believe me.

FilmWise also has quizzes that feature a wide range of different screen shots with themes. It's like a Kindertrauma Funhouse Deluxe surprise! Check them out here, I'm currently killing myself trying to name these houses.

This is my go to site for when I need a good laugh. You may remember that I used this site to feature myself as Steven Spielberg calmly resting in the mouth of Jaws. Yes there I was with a silly hair cut and a man chest and it was amazing. The beauty of Face in the Hole is that you can insert your face into virtually any movie still you want. Try searching for your favorite movie in the search bar, or you can even upload a screenshot of your own. All you have to do is find a good picture of yourself, cut out the face, make the adjustments and voila! Hilarity to ensue. You can even do pictures with all your friends! Try it out and have fun.

This is, if I may, the superior list to Bravo's 100 Scariest Movie Moments. This one is done by AMC and also features a wide range of those films Bravo conveniently chose to leave off. Here is where I first discovered films like The Devils and Salo. Sure it may be still missing some of the highly, highly controversial films but it does talk about Cannibal Holocaust AND Cannibal Ferox. Plus it lists and talks about a lot of great Willy Inducing Moments that we may have forgotten. Get ready to waste at least a half hour, reading about these scenes from A to Z.

Well, that should keep you busy for at least a week. Enjoy and remember that being bored isn't a bad thing---it's the gateway to living. Yeah I made that up and it makes no sense. Don't worry about it.


Eddie Ho said...

You have to go do the Flickchart

I spend endless hours making my lists, just great for boredom.


Thomas Duke said...

I read that opening as "you are a self proclaimed cat sandwich", and thought for a second that "cat sandwich" was some cool kid slang I wasn't aware of yet. I imagine a sad kitten resting between two slices of bread "I AMZ CHEEZBURGER FILLED WIT SAD"

Also, that baby pic is fucking amazing. Thank you for that, and I will check some of this interweb foolishness out.